Jacq's

21 Oct 2003

*siGhx* he realli lie to mi alot of things.. y? y? y? realli.. somethings are betta left unsaid.. i've always believe tht he dun smoke de.. he ownself oso sae tht he dun smoke.. if he smoke he will strike by lightning blah blah blah.. y izzit tht.. he lie to mi..? i nv ever lie to him lo.. NEVER EVER~! he wan to noe wad, i tell him de.. but y.. he wan to lie to mi?! hate liars.. i realli do.. *sObx* so wad if i hate him nw? it no longer makes a differ.. coz.. no matter hw much i hate him.. he oso wun care.. he oso dun lub mi ler.. *siGhx* one moment.. i tot i can put tis r/s down.. now, i tink i haber put down everything bahx.. wo bu zhi dao la~ aRgHx~! he sae i immature.. mayb i realli am.. or i wun b in tis mess nw.. or else i can realli stand up nw.. i realli dunno hw to handle tis stupid thingy.. tell mi, hw shld i handle tis feeling of mine? *sObx* now, i am not even a friend of him.. after toking to mel, i realise i was the cause of it for zhe yang de xia chang.. *siGhx* mel ar mel.. y dun u enlighten mi earlier? y muz wait till nw den enlighten mi? y muz wait till i alreadi lose him completely ler den u tell mi? *siGhx* i guess wadeva i sae or do, nothing can mi bu yi qia ler bahx.. haix.. will god gimme a chance to repent my mistake? sometimes when im alone, i realli try and think wad difference does it make whether i am in tis world or nt.. i mean, no 1 nids mi or wad.. got no very special and close fren.. no 1 cares abt mi.. nt even my parents.. i myself doesnt care abt miself.. so, wad's the point? i am such a failure.. *siGhx* bear sae he nt gng sparks tis fri.. gng somewher else.. die ler lo.. meaning i cfm canot c lion ler.. >.<~~ haix.. lion cfm wid bear de ma.. if bear nt gng.. tht means lion oso lo.. i realli miz the days when we talk on fone.. den he keep on singing.. lOlx~ realli miz the days when he would keep on listening to the same songs.. wei she me he will miz ecko and nt mi..? wei she me? wei she me? wei she me? i dunno hw long to heal tis fucking heart of mine.. ahger muz b feeling much more hurtful den mi.. coz turtle is in love with another ger now.. unlike lion.. lion at least still gt tht 0.000000000000001%.. lOlx~ wo hao nan guo~ aRgHx~! he sae i cant stand up when he's nt ard.. den y izzit tht he wun lend mi a hand to stand up? *siGhx*

- all along ive been a fool to believe in u -