14th June 2004
tis morning h0rs.. mi wake up wid a nightmare sia!! dreamt tat d4r's feelings for mi changed.. den he like don like mi lers.. den i wake up.. i cry!! *sobx* i cry so loud tat i woke d4r up..=x den he ask mi.. wad happen?? y suddenly cry w0rs?? who buwee u?? den i tell him abt e dream.. den he cor mi silly ger..>.< mi realli very scare to lose him mahs!! *sighs* den h0rs, juz nw went JB eat cha kway teow.. *yummy* we oso ordered popian.. but nt nice de w0rs.. lose to s'pore 1.. hehes.. actualli plan to go wild wild wet.. but den too late.. somemore i kip giving d4r attitude.. so nv go.. hehes.. i r0x!! l0ls.. c0s i dun hab swimming costume mahs.. somemore i so FAT!! dun dare show my figure.. l0ls.. so i dun like to go these kind of water places.. but actualli, i lurveeee swimming!! if onli my house gt swimming pool.. den no 1 can c mi wear swimming costume!! den i can wear bikini oso!! l0ls!! sry my darling joni.. hehes.. i broke e rules go eat cha kway teow.. hehes.. c0s i promise her mi gonna go 4 diet!! hahas.. den i go eat so oily food.. -.- aniwae.. when i rch hm tat time.. mi n d4r quarrel again.. *sehz* cos i tell him dunno wad.. he dun lub mi or something lidat.. den i tell him.. even my fren sae u dun lub mi lia0s.. den he sae.. if u dun believe mi and choose to believe ur frens.. den go ahead.. den i dulanz.. walk away.. he call mi back.. sae, "u gonna walk away juz lidat??" so i turn n walk towards him.. tell him jokingly tat.. c him so ke lian.. give him gdbye kiss n0rs.. den he angry wid mi.. -.- he rch hm tat time.. oso nv cor mi or msg mi w0rs.. c0s i online mahs.. so i msg him, "rch hm no nid cor mi ar?" he say he angry w0rs.. ask mi sae SORRY somemore!!! *arghs* den i tell him.. nono.. y shld i sae sorry when its nt my fault.. go steady wid him for 7mths+ and he nv assure mi tat he is true to mi b4.. he sae h0rs.. "everything i do, i tink of u.. got wadeva benefits.. i can indulge miself dun share wid u.. i can save the bills oso.. but i nv lo.. i tink of u and wanna bring u go oso.. nt caring abt hw much is e bill.." i tell him.. u luv mi yes.. but u lub jas more den mi n0rs.. den he sae.. "mi dun lub her lo.. i don wanna kiss & hug her everidae.. i dun fetch her hm everyday.. i dun spent mi time wid her everidae oso.." den i tell him.. e reason for nt being able to do tat is bcos he cant mahs.. cos jas dun lub him liaos.. and she's nt wid him.. so of cos he cant do all these wid her lo.. *sighs* but he tell mi.. he dun lub her w0rs.. im kinda *touched* but.. e suspense is still wid e gold ring.. *sighs* d4r finally quit smoking lers.. he g0rt ard 1wk nv smoke lia0s.. mi keep questioning him.. whether he gt smoke when he in station or out wid his frens or nt.. den whenever i ask him.. he very angry n0rs.. sae i dun trust him.. guess i hab no choice but to believe bahs.. c0s he is some1 who dunno hw to tell lies oso.. he will try.. but always kenna cai chuang (reveal) l0ls!! if he tell lies.. he will smile.. den sae no hab no hab.. but if he angry wid mi.. means he realli nv do lers.. but he cheated mi once.. once bitten twice shy.. cant blame mi 4 nt believing him rites?? *sighs* i hope mi n d4r could last long long n0rs.. realli hope so much.. mi don wan to hab another bf.. except him w0rs.. *sighs*
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