7th July 2004
3:25am
feeling sadx now.. *sighx* cant believe my d4r wanna break wid mi juz nw.. nearly bahs.. we ytd quarrelled.. abt some silly things.. but i cried.. c0s, i felt humilliations.. i noe he's joking at all.. but he ish my bf.. and he actualli sae tat.. e things tat he sae is a fact.. so i realli cant take it as a joke.. confuse?? duhz.. wadeva.. i din reply him when he ask mi to tok.. so he hanged up e fone and called mi twice.. but i din pick up e fone.. c0s i was crying all da way.. and fell asleep.. was simply too tired.. when i woke up.. no missed calls.. no nothing.. den he msg mi.. i tink he msg mi c0s he wanna take back his window xp CD.. if not, i dun tink he will call bahs.. *sighs* den, he nv call mi n0rs.. juz some words of xchange in OZ.. he went to lessons.. during breaktime, he oso nv call.. he will definitely call de.. when he got breaktime.. knew him too well.. but he din.. i wonder wad he was doing at tat time.. guess he was toking wid other gers?? *sighx* finally, he call mi.. i tell mi sis to pickup e fone and lied tat im not at hm.. i don wanna c him.. and i wanna noe wad he's gonna do.. in e end, he juz take e CD and gones.. rch hm, he ask i at hm ars?? i tell him e truth.. tell him tat i tell my sis to lie n everything.. den we started to quarrel.. quarrel until he sae tat wait till i tink i could treat him equally gd den contact him.. i sae ok.. c0s i tink.. mayb we realli nid to end tis r/s.. c0s we were like everyday quarrelling.. nv had a day of peace.. and, i felt tat he dun lurve mi animore.. *s0bx* -tears- i dunno how to change.. i wanted to.. but, i cant control.. always when we quarrel.. onli den he will sae he put mi in e first place in his heart.. and he love mi tat sorta things.. normally, he wun.. i dunno.. i realli felt tat im missing in his heart.. if he realli do love mi so much.. y did he treat mi so differently..?? den i nv reply to d4r lers.. den d4r msg mi.. sae u realli wan brk?? den in e end.. no brk.. mayb, brk oso gd?? i dunno.. having mixed feelings now.. he called after our conversation in MSN.. den i was watching guess*3.. so i ask him to cor baq later.. c0s i wanna watch.. he sae last time u will sacrifice dun watch e show now u ask mi to put down..-.- but i realli wan watch mahs.. later tok wid him, he sae i watch nv tok.. den kp.. den he sae, dun u tink we got barriers etc.. yes bahs?? wo bu zhi dao.. had e worry tat no matter wad, we 2 are going separate ways soon.. *sighs* realli, true love never run smooth.. *s0bx*
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